Sunday, January 18, 2009

I Fail At Rascal Flatts

I thought it would be fun. Boy, was I wrong.

I have deep admiration for the shiny gloss and technical perfection displayed on Rascal Flatt's hits. I happily sing along to their songs when I monitor country radio in my car. Yet until last night, I'd never seen them perform.

It's going to take some time to recover.

Their concert Saturday night at the Sprint Center was excruciating.

Just how bad was it? I witnessed almost 300 live music performances in 2008. In the 18 days of the new year, I've already caught 15 live acts. I disliked Rascal Flatts' effort more than any of those shows. In fact, the last time musicians made me so miserable was during Shania Twain's dismal concert at Kemper Arena in 2003.

It's not that Rascal Flatts didn't try. Their light show and extended stage were impressive. And the band gave it their all. Yet the aggressive blandness and shameless pandering- "I see some of the greatest country music fans in the entire world"- rubbed me the wrong way.

But what do I know? I was seated amid a sea of ecstatic twelve-year-old girls and delirious gay men. They loved it.

"I thought black was supposed to be slimming," a man seated next to me hissed as opening act Jessica Simpson strutted across the stage in a tiny black dress.

Whatever. I thought she was gorgeous. And she can sing.

Simpson's obvious charms, however, are poorly suited to an arena setting. She could be a spectacular cabaret singer in the tradition of Peggy Lee and Marilyn Monroe. I'd happily pay top dollar to see her perform in a small club.

Rascal Flatts? Not so much.

(Here's a proper review of the concert.)


Vaughn said...

You either have too much money (if you didn't get the tix for free) or too much time on your hands. Rascal Flatts?!! They define "suck"!
Their very existence is an insult to most of the people you feature on your blog.
Tell me you really went there to see Jessica Simpson (for visual reasons) and all will be forgiven.

Happy In Bag said...

Gee whiz, Vaughn! I didn't exactly write the band a love letter.

Jessica? She's purty.

Anonymous said...

A significant percentage of the crowd was gay men? Seriously? Why?

Happy In Bag said...

I don't know why my section contained a preponderance gay men, Anon. But it did.

Happy In Bag said...

Make that- a preponderance "of" gay men.

Rick in PV said...

Gay men are the Rascal Flatts audience? I wondered who bought that stuff ...

Anonymous said...

Rascal Flatts? Puhleeze!

Anonymous said...

Yeah I worked their show a few days ago in NC, and boy did it suck. I'm just glad I was getting paid for it, 'cos it was truly as bad as any show I've ever listened to. Great light show. But as a whole it was way to panderful. BTW, it seems Winston Salem NC has some of the other best country music fans in the world -- at least that's what I heard.

Cool blog, 1st time here.


Happy In Bag said...

Thanks for checking in, AKD. Your perspective is enlightening.

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